THE "NOT-SO" NEWS/JBLA: Paris Hilton Arrested For DWB

Thursday, September 07, 2006

Paris Hilton Arrested For DWB

Los Angeles police arrested Hotel Heiress Paris Hilton yesterday for driving while blonde.

Police reports state that the rather gaunt looking Hilton was driving erratically in a much too expensive car.

Hilton denied the accusation stating that it is hard to look at yourself in the mirror, talk on the cell phone while scanning through e-mails on a portable computer while sipping an energy drink while navigating the streets of Los Angeles.

Ms Hilton will face a judge early next week and is expected to plead not guilty to all charges levied against her, including the misuse of peroxide.

12 Comments:

Blogger Morgen said...

As I believe Joy pointed out on The View this morning: she's an heiress without a driver? wtf was she doin' driving herself around anyway?
you KNOW when I make it neauveau riche (and I hafta learn how to spell nooo-veau riche first, eh?) that this homo is hiring a driver! I'll even let him wear a shirt once in a while, I swear!!!!

10:49 AM  
Blogger Matt-Man said...

It wasn't all her fault. Mel Gibson was going to drive her home but he was passed out in the back seat.

10:55 AM  
Blogger Lizza said...

Poor Paris. Well, not really. LOL

12:01 PM  
Blogger jbwritergirl said...

Like I always tell my daughter -- nothing good happens on the streets of Los Angeles after midnight.

Poor Paris my ass!

1:41 PM  
Blogger Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq. said...

Just another example of the west-coast, liberal elite ignoring our laws and endangering our safety.

Paris Hilton, why do you hate America?

-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.

1:54 PM  
Blogger mist1 said...

Doesn't DWB stand for Driving While Black?

I had no idea that Paris is a sista.

3:54 PM  
Blogger Bobby Griffin said...

I left a comment on your USAVoice article, I hope your bosses see it!

3:57 PM  
Blogger jbwritergirl said...

Thank you Bobby. Nice comment by the way, however I don't think it will win me a raise. I am trying to switch out of the life section as I am far better at hard breaking news, which is where I would have filed that story if I could.

4:32 PM  
Blogger Pawlie Kokonuts said...

One of your breast posts. I mean, breastest. I mean, well, I'm better at hard news too (meaning it's news when it's hard). HARHARHAR.

4:43 AM  
Blogger jbwritergirl said...

Your wife said the same thing Pawlie,LOL

5:15 AM  
Blogger Nick Badway said...

DWB? Driving While Baked.

6:19 AM  
Blogger COxford said...

Poor little spoiled rich girl.

We'll be checking your stories out on a regular basis.

9:28 AM  

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