North Korea Nuke Test Causes Global Unrest
The foreign press is reporting the biggest nuke test ever occurred late last week just inside the North Korean border.
In an attempt to lower gas bills, North Korean officials admit they distributed more than 12 million microwave ovens to residents along with two bags of Orville Redenbacher microwave popcorn.
"It is our desire to make the world take notice of our humble country and our desire to reduce natural resource consumption," said one official. "We know that this has been protested and that globally it will be looked upon as devious but we felt it was in the best interest of some of our poorer families."
At one minute before noon on Friday every resident stood with their hand on the knob of their newly acquired microwave oven in anticipation of the worlds largest pop-off in recorded history.
"It was kind of scary," one resident said. "It was eerily quiet everywhere except for when the clock struck noon. You could literally feel the earth move as the bags of popcorn began to pop everywhere."
The effects were felt as far away as South Korea and those along the border sought cover from what they thought was a mass invasion.
"It sounded like thousands of guns shooting bullets," said one resident who appeared dirty and tired after spending nearly one hour buried inside a small hole in a local mine shaft. "It only lasted about five minutes but the intensity was so incredible I don't think I will ever get that noise out of my head."
President Bush also released a statement to the press that suggested he was displeased with their testing.
"If North Korea wants to pop-off without global agreement then we can certainly accommodate them with our own nuke tests," Bush said. "It won't be the first time and it won't be the last time."
In an attempt to lower gas bills, North Korean officials admit they distributed more than 12 million microwave ovens to residents along with two bags of Orville Redenbacher microwave popcorn.
"It is our desire to make the world take notice of our humble country and our desire to reduce natural resource consumption," said one official. "We know that this has been protested and that globally it will be looked upon as devious but we felt it was in the best interest of some of our poorer families."
At one minute before noon on Friday every resident stood with their hand on the knob of their newly acquired microwave oven in anticipation of the worlds largest pop-off in recorded history.
"It was kind of scary," one resident said. "It was eerily quiet everywhere except for when the clock struck noon. You could literally feel the earth move as the bags of popcorn began to pop everywhere."
The effects were felt as far away as South Korea and those along the border sought cover from what they thought was a mass invasion.
"It sounded like thousands of guns shooting bullets," said one resident who appeared dirty and tired after spending nearly one hour buried inside a small hole in a local mine shaft. "It only lasted about five minutes but the intensity was so incredible I don't think I will ever get that noise out of my head."
President Bush also released a statement to the press that suggested he was displeased with their testing.
"If North Korea wants to pop-off without global agreement then we can certainly accommodate them with our own nuke tests," Bush said. "It won't be the first time and it won't be the last time."
posted by jbwritergirl at 4:51 PM
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