Lethal Injection Too Much For Criminals

Both California and Florida Justice departments recently suspended the use of lethal injections to end the lives of convicted felons on death row.

Officials in both states met earlier this week hoping to work out a new system that would cause less suffering by those inmates facing the death penalty.

This falls on the heels of the recently botched execution of Angel Diaz who was executed in Florida last Wednesday for the 1979 murder of a Miami strip club manager. The inmate apparently suffered needless pain in part due to the high tolerance level to lethal drugs that he acquired during his time in prison. Officials were forced to administer a second dose to finish him off.

A spokesman for the consortium, which included Supreme Court Justices, leaders from the American Lawyers Association and an environmental group, said they have come up with a solution that will inevitably solve the problem.

"Inmates will be put to death by Lethal Ingestion," he said. "Every convict on death row will be fed meals from Taco Bell, The Olive Garden and will be forced to consume three portions a day of California grown lettuce and green onions in amounts large enough to eventually kill them."

The new bill is expected to pass hands down when congress reconvenes in January.