THE "NOT-SO" NEWS/JBLA: To Die-For Clothing

Thursday, November 16, 2006

To Die-For Clothing

This fall, be prepared to be shocked by clothing companies boasting subzero clothing sizes.

"What most people wear to cover one thigh is likely to be what wraps around another's waist with these new clothing sizes," said a Beverly Hills nutritionist. "This is absurd and what's worse, this trend will make many women feel they are obese even if they wear a size seven."

Banana Republic, who is owned by The Gap, will begin offering clothes in sizes smaller than zero, according to reports.

It is also rumored that Nicole Miller will jump on the bandwagon as well to market her 'sub-zero' line of designer fashion.

The timing of this news does not bode well for many, especially in light of the recent death of 5' 8" Brazilian model Ann Carolina Reston, who at 21-years-old weighed in at a mere 88 pounds at the time of her death. Reports say that she was surviving on a diet of tomatoes and apples in order to maintain her slender figure.

Health officials are alarmed and are sending out warnings to those attempting to fit into these absurdly sized wardrobes.

"Diet and die is not where we want people to be headed for the sake of fashion."

3 Comments:

Blogger Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq. said...

Good catch, JB. At such low weights, how will those woman ever procreate and fulfill their Biblical mandate?

Banana Republic and Nicole Miller, why do you hate America?

-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.

8:33 PM  
Blogger that frolicsome kid said...

Hahaha, love the title! The fashion industry is really trying to force women, especially the younger ones, to really feel conscious of their own self and lose weight so miserably as if they are suffering poverty. All those just to fit into the "subzero-sized" clothes.

And I pity the Brazilian model who died from anorexia. 88 pounds doesn't seem to be very much!

7:51 PM  
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10:44 PM  

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