THE "NOT-SO" NEWS/JBLA: California Residents Most Retarded

Sunday, October 05, 2008

California Residents Most Retarded

A new study just released by researchers states that over the past 30 years residents of California have become more and more flame resistant.

Unknowingly we have been given super powers to walk through flames unharmed.

This is good news for those who constantly face the annual burn caused by natural phenomena's such as lightning stikes, or unnatural phenomena's such as arsonists.

"This is great news because now I won't have to evacuate every time the fire season hits," said a resident of a hillside that sees a fire once or twice a year. "The house may go but I know that I'll still be alive and kicking."

The new data supports this after lengthy testing on human blood. The fire retardant chemical polybrominated diphenyl ethers, or PBDE's, has been used in the manufacturing of furniture, bedding and clothes for more than thirty years. It enters the blood stream through the skin and through inhalation in the form of dust particles. Californians have twice the level in their blood than any other state in the U.S., and their homes have ten times that amount.

It is believed that many residents will rest easy knowing that they will not spontaneously combust if they drop a cigarette on their lap or run through a wild fire.

2 Comments:

Blogger Sandee (Comedy +) said...

Okay, but what are some of the side effects? Just asking. Yikes. Have a great day sweetie. :)

11:27 AM  
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5:17 PM  

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